Limericks etc

Asking 12 people to agree on something is like asking 11 people to agree on something, only worse. At least 9% worse. Maybe more, it depends if it's linear.

There once was a guy on the dart
Who majorly needed to fart
He looked all around
No place better he found
And permitted his butt cheeks to part.

There once was a girl on the luas
Some scumbags were shoutin' abuse
She undid them with words
Like what time does to turds
And their willies fell off from misuse.

There once were no cities at all
Long before the saints peter and paul
No farts on no dart
No scum and no art
And no-one around when you fall.

Things I'm Really Good At

1. Knowing I'm not going to do what I'm supposed to do
2. Finding reasons not to do it
3. Being pissed off at myself for not doing it, while I'm in the middle of not doing it
   
4. Deciding it'll be different next time

That Dublin Wit, #1

Two dimbo schoolgirls upstairs on the bus, walking down the the aisle as the bus takes a corner.

Dimbo #1: Oh, I'm gonna fall ...

Dimbo #2: You fell on yer ma.