Reading Material #1

This website no longer has a comments facility. The ideas expressed herein are not open to debate. Your like or dislike of this piece should form and settle in your own head, and then dissolve to the nothing from whence it came. This is a piece written by someone else. Just read it.

There is no outlet here for your tedious expressions of self. This is neither a collaborative effort nor an interactive experience. This is not a place for you to make fake friends - this is not social pornography. There is no guestbook and there is no gift shop.

Do not read this while also watching television. Do not read this while checking emails or engaged in a gabble of text messages. Do one thing at a time, and do it properly. You might be surprised at the results. If you are, I don't want to hear about it.

Do not read this while eating. Do not read this while digesting your food. Do not read this if you switched on the computer for no particular reason, and do not read this if there's somebody else in the room.

Do not read anything short enough that you won't miss anything. Do not read this. Read a book. Switch off your phone first. Do not write 'first!!!' in the margins.

A Brief Note to Your Good Selves

Fellow humans, contemporaries, peers. Hello. Before you go any further, please find a dictionary. A proper one, from a previous decade. And look up the words fulsome, decimate and literally.

Also - and I'm very serious about this - stop using revert altogether until I say otherwise.